The Comeback - Week 6

Today on David to Goliath [13-minute read]:

1. The Reward of Real Work

2. An Unexpected Encounter

3. Main Topic – Solopreneurship is B.S.

4. Mindset – To Hell with Taking Part

5. Book Recommendation - Influence

Before we dive into this newsletter - I'd like to remind you that we build these from the podcasts, where my friend Dan and I let our imaginations run wild.

If you're interested in hearing our thoughts come to life in a free library podcast studio, listen to this week's episode here (we’ve nearly hit 100 downloads - roll out the red carpet!).

Right, are you ready?

Today’s Newsletter is full of strong opinions, harsh truths and one moment that brought me to tears.

Enough chatter - let’s get down to business.

Road to 100,000: Behind the Scenes

The Reward of Real Work

Let me take you behind the scenes - what goes into crafting the content you receive at David to Goliath every Tuesday and Thursday.

Our mission is clear – give you the business strategies, skillsets and mindset to reach the top 1% - while discovering yourself in the process. 

As you know, Tuesday is the comeback story. Here, through documenting my comeback I share the new skillsets I’m learning in the hope you can implement and get ahead.

As well as being open about my struggles (I’m also human, just like you).

Thursday is the interview with the unsung heroes, the underdogs of our generation, bringing their stories to life.

Sharing the takeaways so you can not only be inspired by their incredible feats but also take this wisdom and turn it into results.

Offering action items for people navigating through the struggle - escaping the life of mediocrity.

I don’t just want you to watch my journey unfold - I want you to be climbing the mountain with me.

We’re in this together (more on that in todays main topic). 

Here’s how we bring the Newsletters to life:

Rinse and repeat.

Pushing and pushing - being driven by our own internal standards.

When and only when could we have given nothing more, we can be satisfied.

An Unexpected Encounter

Last week, I met up with somebody who reached out to me (a lot!).

Shwetank Tamer owns an e-commerce SAAS company called Cooee, helping out customers with conversation rate optimization.

We went for a steak and had a real heart to heart.

There were times we both teared up in the conversation – I shared the struggles of my own journey nearly taking my own life. He told me his struggles of putting his family through the stress of building a start-up.

Before we continue, I must add that a strong motivator for me is the desire to become a father one day.

I envision a future where, gazing into my child's eyes (for some reason I imagine it’s a little girl), I say to her with 100% conviction “go after your dreams with literally everything you’ve got Athena - no matter what” (yes, I’ve already named her too).

Regardless if of whether that’s business, painting, or dancing (she just can’t support Manchester United). 

But for that conviction to be true in my eyes, first I must lead by example, and push myself to the absolute limits of my own potential.

How could I possibly tell my little girl to go after her dreams if I’ve not pursued mine?

I literally could not live with myself - and this keeps me going when times get tough. 

Maybe you can relate?

Funnily enough, this guy could.

He has a two year old daughter (what a coincidence).

He recently left a big salaried job to pursue his business ventures, and has doubts creeping in constantly.

He told me about a moment earlier that morning: “As I held my daughter in my hands looking into her little innocent eyes I could feel a lump in my throat…”

“I told myself no matter how hard it gets I must keep going. For her”.

Damn, this is nearly bringing me to tears just writing this.

And it was at that moment he told me he felt lucky to be sat with me.

But I called him out: “No. You made this moment happen all by yourself”.

The bottom line is this guy is out there creating his own luck.

He recognised that to succeed, he must reach out to people a few steps ahead – those who have walked the path he wants to walk.

Not necessarily people who have built billion dollar companies – their advice may not be immediately relevant now.

But you must broaden your network.

He reached out to many entrepreneurs on LinkedIn (I think he followed up with me 8 times to no avail). Then finally he spoke to a mutual connection who put us in touch. 

If you seek and pursue connections relentlessly, eventually someone will respond, and one conversation could change your life.

This is what I did at the start of my journey – I bought a course – started making connections within the community.

Yes it was slow at the start, but slowly but surely, it started snowballing.

Now with over 45,000 followers on LinkedIn (and a shiny new top voice badge - I’m kinda chuffed with this even if it’s vein!) I have some leverage.

Although I have so much more to learn - I’m a baby in the game of business (and life).

You (and I) need to understand that you’re gonna get rejected. Hundreds, potentially thousands of times.

But if you simply find 100 people and put them all on a spreadsheet, I guarantee you will be able to get one person out for a coffee.

Then guess what? Business owners know other business owners.

They’ll connect you with their friends and point you in the right direction. 

Pro Tip: connect with people who already have all the connections 

Then actually do your research – don’t turn up to that call or coffee unprepared (this guy had gone through my LinkedIn profile to see where I went to University - that meant a lot to me).

Think of 3 key things you want to ask them. Make their life easy.

If I went back in time, what I’d do is I’d send out 1000 personalised meeting requests.

Until I’ve sent 1000, I wouldn’t even contemplate my feelings.

At the start you don’t know what it takes. 

But I’m telling you what it takes – it’s gonna take 999 no’s for 1 yes.

And on that road to 1000, you’re probably gonna get more than one yes. But you’re a champion so you’re not going in with that expectation.

It’s hard, it’s draining, and it’s mentally taxing.

Most falter early, surrendering to the allure of an easier path.

But when you dig deep enough, you think of your future children or as Shwetank did with his little baby daughter in his hands - you’ll find that reason.

Remember: If you are willing to invest in yourself, the world is ready to invest in you. 

But no-one is going to do the work for you.

The moment you start believing you’re not special is the exact moment you’re not.

Main topic – Solopreneurship: The One Person Prison

I’m probably gonna piss a lot of people off with this one.

I disagree with the ‘Solopreneurship’ movement wholeheartedly.

Although first I must take my hat off to anyone who’s quit their 9-5 and is getting after it. It’s not the critic who counts after all. 

Fair play taking that leap of faith (we love that at David to Goliath).

Solopreneurship, at first glance, may seem like the epitome of freedom and control.

The lone wolf navigating the entrepreneurial landscape, escaping the 9-5, calling all the shots.

That’s what they’re chasing.

But let’s stop and think:

What ultimately is freedom?

Do you actually believe it is best pursued as a solitary endeavour?

My definition of freedom is working on what I love, in line with my strengths - every single day. And I’m old enough to know I’m not good at most things (trust me, you can ask my ex’s).

I personally believe Solopreneurship is a self-imposed prison with walls constructed from the weight of every responsibility. 

Every decision, triumph, and setback falls squarely on your shoulders.

This pursuit of success becomes a lonely struggle, draining the joy out of your journey.

By the way I’ve spoken to solopreneurs who have told me exactly this (shout-out to Nejc Jamscek who opened up about this - he puts out fantastic LinkedIn content btw!). 

In my opinion, this one-man or one-woman prison is a breeding ground for self-doubt and exhaustion.

There's no one to share the load, bounce ideas off, or provide crucial support during the lows of your journey.

The autonomy you sought becomes a disguise for isolation, trapping your ambitions within the echo chamber of your thoughts.

And the dream you once cradled in your heart, the very passion that fuelled your entrepreneurial spirit, transforms into a heavy burden. Hollow and unfulfilling. 

We've all heard the saying, "No man is an island," and the same holds true for entrepreneurs.

A company by definition is “a group of people”.

With its alluring promise of autonomy, Solopreneurship is a deceptive concept that undermines the power of collaboration, shared ideas, and collective genius.

The idea that you must shoulder every responsibility, wear every hat, and bear the weight of your dreams alone is not only unrealistic but also detrimental to your potential for success.

Now, let's shift our gaze to the strength found in unity. The true life of a free, rule breaking entrepreneur.

We are at our best when we combine our strengths, pool our resources, and foster a culture of mutual support.

Breaking free from the Solopreneur myth doesn't mean relinquishing control or compromising your vision.

Although it is about recognizing that true success is a team sport. 

Building a network of like-minded individuals who share your passion and vision not only multiplies your skills but also amplifies your impact. 

Seeking help is not a sign of weakness but a testament to your strength.

And a powerful step towards liberation.

This is a lesson taught by nature itself. A lone tree may withstand a single storm, but together a forest stands strong against the wildest gales (damn I love that).

Similarly, the strength of your team lies in its collective resilience.

Humans are incredibly complicated – we’re all wired very differently. That’s the most beautiful thing. We’re perfectly imperfect.

Thus a team is a convergence of skills, knowledge, and experiences playing in harmony.

A wellspring of innovation, problem-solving, and creative brilliance.

When one member stumbles, others lend a helping hand to ensure no one falls.

This mutual support creates an environment where setbacks become stepping stones, and the weight of adversity is shared, making the climb to success less arduous.

Meanwhile different backgrounds, perspectives, and approaches foster a rich tapestry of ideas. Diversity trumps all.

When everyone is aligned with a common purpose, the energy generated is truly magic (if you’re in a high-performing team right now you’ll know exactly what I mean).

You see? Solopreneurship is working against our biology.

We are humans. We are tribal by nature.

Just as a football (not soccer) team has players with distinct roles, your team comprises individuals with specialized skills.

Remember that beyond the professional landscape, networking satisfies a fundamental human need – the need for connection.

Building bridges, not walls. 

Business is a team game. 

Ditch Solopreneurship. Instead find your tribe.

Find your people. Find your freedom.

Mindset – To Hell with Taking Part

Right, now you’ve got me fired up.

Again I might lose some subscribers for this one put you know what? Better to be hated than not stand up for what you believe in.

Here goes…

I recently had a conversation with Nishal, an entrepreneur who will feature on this Thursday’s newsletter (watch out for that!). 

He should have been selected to compete for the nationals in Basketball but wasn’t. 

At this point we naturally started talking about competition.

Why it plays an important role in our society. 

So enough with the sugar-coated nonsense about celebrating "taking part” hey? 

It's an idea that has infiltrated our culture like a pervasive virus.

Let's call it what it is - a trap for the mediocre (yep, the truth hurts).

But look, I want you to win so I’m keeping it real.

It’s just not how the world works.

If you’re reading this, you’re probably living in a capitalist country.

How does capitalism work? Competition. Survival of the fittest.

When I was younger and used to play football with my dad and brothers – my dad used to kick the living daylight out of us when we were little kids.

He did everything to win.

Now me and my brothers are all hyper competitive and getting after it in life.

We got taught that it’s NOT OK to lose. And I massively appreciate that. It’s given us an edge.

Just on a quick side note - of course there are certain circumstances – for example if you or your child are mentally handicapped at birth – that requires specific context and I completely respect that.

I’m speaking to the 99% of you. 

In my opinion: Taking part and losing should not be celebrated.

Celebrating participation is a distraction, a feeble attempt to shield ourselves from the harsh reality that only the winners are remembered.

Life is not a kindergarten sports day; it's a battlefield. When you’re on the battlefield, are the generals handing out trophies just for showing up?

Do your competitors care about your participation medal?

No. 

They're too busy strategizing, executing, and winning.

Life is no different. It is a competition, and the scoreboard doesn't lie.

Celebrating participation is an open invitation for the winners to manipulate you. 

When you lose you it’s OK to be unhappy – look at yourself in the mirror and ask ‘what can I do to improve so this doesn’t happen again?’.

Olympic athletes don't train for years to bask in the glory of participation. They train to win.

Business leaders don't stay up until the late hours of the morning and bend over backwards sacrificing for their people to get a pay cheque; they do it to push the envelope and bring greatness into the light.

Winners don't settle for lukewarm connections; they demand excellence.

They seize opportunities, outsmart the competition, and climb to the top.

Day in, day out.

If you're content with just participating, you'll find yourself at the mercy of those who play to win – and they won't hesitate to exploit you.

Ventures built on the foundation of participation rather than winning are destined for mediocrity.

I say let’s ditch the participation trophies and embrace the ruthless reality: you're either in it to win, or you're just another pawn in someone else's game.

Reject the illusion of celebrating mediocrity, and step into the arena with a mindset focused solely on victory.

Winning at all costs. Winning for you - and your people.

In the words of the late Kobe Bryant: “Winning is everything”.

Book Recommendation: ‘Influence’

Here’s a book that as an entrepreneur looking to sharpen his marketing skills, changed my life.

A masterclass in human psychology: Influence by Robert Cialdini.

With accolades on the New York Times Best Seller list, Fortune's "75 Smartest Business Books," and a prominent mention in "50 Psychology Classics," it helps you understand the psychology behind why humans say "yes." 

Are you in sales or marketing, striving to master the craft of persuasion?

Do you find it challenging to refuse the requests of a persistent salesperson?

Are you seeking ways to enhance your ability to convince others?

Then this book is a must read for you.

Read it, make notes and watch as the world around you becomes clearer (and probably a little darker).

By reading this book, you will question all the shortcuts silently shaping your decisions.

Dr. Cialdini unveils the secrets of persuasion through six universal principles.

1. Reciprocation: The strength of giving and receiving – creating a cycle of positive engagement.

2. Commitment & Consistency: The art of staying true to your commitments, forging a foundation for personal and professional success.

3. Social Proof: The currents of social influence, realizing that the actions of others can guide your own choices.

4. Likability: The factors that make us prefer saying "yes" to those we know and like.

5. Authority: Following the trail of authority figures, recognizing the impact of titles, appearances, and endorsements in shaping decisions.

6. Scarcity: The allure of limited opportunities, tapping into the psychology that elevates the perceived value of scarce resources.

Once you understand these 6 core principles not only will you be able to apply them to every new website, ad, or piece of content you and your team makes.

You will also start to see how all of the biggest and best companies are using these strategies to persuade the masses.

It’s like putting on a pair of glasses for the first time and seeing the world from a completely new perspective.

Most books I just recommend but this one is a must read.

Buy it and see the world through the lense of Cialdini himself.

You’ll thank him later.

Today In Summary:

1) Reward of Real Work: It’s not the mansion, the cars or the money. The real reward is knowing when you literally couldn’t have done anymore and you unveil the masterpiece. No external validation necessary. It’s all within.

2) Network by Rejection: The best way to get ahead is spend time with those in your field who have already walked the path. Take inspiration from Shwetank and be willing to take 999 no’s to get 1 yes. The one which can open all the doors.

3) Play to Your Strengths: Unlike the fake freedom sold in this new ‘Solopreneurship’ movement, find people who have strengths in areas you don’t. Then build a team, a tribe and all win together. It’s in our DNA. 

4) Don’t Celebrate Taking Part: Be honest about the way the world works and understand you're either in it to win, or you're just another pawn in someone else's game.

5) Learn How to Persuade: Use Cialdini’s 6 laws of persuasion to influence your audience: Reciprocity, scarcity, social proof, authority, consistency and likeability. Even if you don’t, you’ll understand the world from a new perspective and can avoid manipulation.

Thank you so much for reading to the end.

Crafting this newsletter brings immeasurable joy to both Dan and me. Having people reach out to us makes every single bit of effort worthwhile.

If you find yourself facing challenges at this moment, remember, you're not navigating this journey alone—we're in this together.

In the face of adversity, our collective resilience, fuelled by unwavering self-belief, will see us through.

So my friend, keep dreaming like a giant. But fight and believe in your dreams like a god damn underdog!

Together, let’s rewrite history baby.

Yours truly,

-Nigel Thomas

P.S. If you enjoyed today’s Newsletter please take 30 seconds to respond so we know there are humans on the other end! And any critical feedback you have fire away - so we can make it more valuable for you!